Wednesday, November 9, 2011

You know you're writing lit fic when

Ok, I was going throught this thread and decided to pick the ones that apply to me. LitFic is so for me. <3
  • People ask you a direct, simple questions about your novel and your answer always seems to be "uuuuhhhhhh..." 
  • After planning your novel for weeks, you realise you have neglected the plot.
  • when you can write five thousand words and then realize that your character is alone in a room and hasn't said a word the entire time.
  • when you get about 50K words into the thing, you get distracted by the thought that you're actually writing a huge interconnected multilevel personal essay, which of course will be impossible to sell to a publisher, let alone market
  • When you sit back after planning and think "you know what,even I probably wouldn't read this."
  • There are so many cigarettes in your novel you gave up quitting.
  • You're not sure if you're stable enough to be writing about anyone who is that messed up. 
  • Making tea counts as 'action'.
  • Your character is doomed to spend over three fourths of the book literally talking to herself/himself.
  • All weather is more than just weather!
  • When you're planning on killing a character in the first chapter, but you're not writing a murder mystery.
  • When your main character doesn't have any friends. Who needs those, anyway?
  • you're adding references to "Dante's Inferno", even though you've never read it. You just think it sounds amazing.
  • When you sit at the computer, try to think of a plot, and realize deep things about you character's past; and still have no plot.
  • When your so called plot is just characters experiencing life in whatever setting you decided to put them in.
  • When the MC has a meaningless or unsatisfying sexual encounter. 
  • When you spend twenty minutes searching name meanings so that you can use a name with the same meaning from a character from a previous book, so that people who look can realize the connection.
  • When literature itself is a theme.
  • When you have the most fun writing about a crazy person
  • When the main villain is an emotion
  • When your entire novel is a flashback with flashbacks within the flashbacks.  There are no "good" people, only the blindly naive.
  • You reference or allude to other works of Literary canon (10 points if you can make a non-obvious Shakespeare reference). 
  • When you start thinking the MC is actually completely insane, somewhere in an asylum telling these crazy stories.
  • When the central conflict doesn't get resolved until years after one party has died.
  • When you do include dialogue but it takes several pages just to have a simple conversation because there is more internal dialogue and description and mini-flashbacks than there is actual dialogue between characters.
  • When your character thinks they might have been alive for all of time. 
  • When one of your characters says "I'm in love" and that translates as "I'm in deep shit"
  • When someone says to you, "God, that's so depressing. Don't you write anything happy or light?"
  • People ask who the "good" or "bad" guys are in your novel and you have to explain that they're all just people - not good, bad, or anything else.

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